Allow Natural Consequences – Proverbs in Practice
Last week, former procrastinators, we noticed that the sluggard does not operate in reality. He expects benefit without doing the necessary work at the necessary time. Instead, he receives nothing. This is a natural consequence of his inaction.
“The sluggard does not plow in autumn; he will seek at harvest and have nothing.” Proverbs 20:4
One of the best ways to bring this lesson home is to allow natural consequences – the second point in this statement. We must do this for ourselves and for our children. Proverbs gives us many chances to see that spelled out. Just let happen the things that naturally follow the action or inaction. Do not make excuses for yourself or bail your child out by doing for him what he should’ve done himself.
I’m ashamed to say that years ago I expected my family to bail me out – wait for me or help do my work. Praise the Lord, He helped me accept my responsibility – and the consequences I earned. I finally asked my husband to leave me if I were not ready at the appointed time to go somewhere. It was effective.
Of course, we show grace, but it is not grace to routinely bail someone out. This teaches him to count on you to relieve him of any consequences. He continues on as a sluggard and his character suffers. If he doesn’t plow when he should, it is beneficial for him to face the consequences of having nothing later.
The price we pay for learning this as children is much less than what we pay as adults. It also affects fewer people when we are children. Though it hurts to miss out on ice cream because I didn’t pick up toys, it’s much more serious to pay a fine for not filing taxes on time. Learning this lesson early makes everyone’s life easier.
Allowing natural consequences helps the slothful person begin to connect with reality and take responsibility. If mommy constantly covers for her child’s laziness, he will be terribly jolted when his professor gives a failing grade for turning in a paper late, or when the boss fires him because work is not done in a timely manner and now father has no job.
How else might this play out? Maybe you tell your child of an appropriate age that he must be in the car at a certain time or you will leave without him. When the hour comes and he is not there, you actually drive away. Natural consequences. They’re hard to allow, but worth it.
What natural consequences do you need to accept for yourself or allow for others?
